March 10, 2010

Just poppin..

...in for more than a hot minute.

First, I just want to say thank you to Rasha for giving such a heartfelt post.
You are absolutely wonderful and I appreciate you being here for me and listening to me. Thanks for being such a great friend. It amazes me that we've never met, but it almost feels like we've known each other forever.
Thank you for being so kind and understanding!

So her post was about having lost someone very close to you.....

This past weekend I was hit with a baseball bat.
Not really, the way I felt almost didn't compare to even that...
it was much worse...
So, the news is....
My Mommy has been given no more than 5 years to live.
Her medications are not working and they see no hope.
Like she is a sinking ship with waves 50ft high crashing down on her...

Guess what? 
I believe there is hope for her.
I believe that she will make it out alive...
meds or no meds.
I will prepare myself for the worst..
even though I never want to come face to face with the worst.
But I won't say goodbye.

My heart feels like it's been ripped out of my chest.
Like Im loosing someone who completes my heart...
 The one person who loves me for who I am and who I have become.
Who is not afraid to tell me the truth, even though it may hurt me. The one person who through all my imperfections will never judge me, but help me learn from my mistakes.
The person who has been my best friend and Mother and knows the difference and the time to be one or the other.

No one ever wants to loose someone who close to them...
No one EVER wants to loose anyone in their lives for that matter...
Im not sure if I can handle....

Life has taken me on it's very own rollercoaster these last few weeks and Im hanging on by a thread...
But I'm believing, praying and keeping my faith.
I keep believing God is good and he has a plan.
I'm not writing this for your sympathy.
Only for your prayers, your belief, your hope, and your faith that she will prove the doctors wrong.
That some way, some how, I can convince God to heal my Mom and take her sickness away and leave her here with me on earth. To watch my babies grow and to hear her call me Sweet Pea and braid my hair.
Call me selfish, but I can't imagine life without her.

So, I guess this is me asking, please just believe, pray and have faith with me.
She needs it.

Oh and PS...
Davony's pageant is this weekend...
Ehhh Hmmmm, 
FINGERS CROSSED PLEASE!

8 comments:

Rasha said...

I love you... I love your faith and you know she is in my prayers!!!

Im so excited for day days pageant!!!!!!! pics pics pics record record record

Love you hunny!

Catherine Anne said...

Crystal, My prayers are with you and will be daily. Im am so very sorry for the pain you must be feeling. Be still and know that he is God.~

Al said...

wow, that is heart breaking news lovely... im really sorry to hear that..

but i will have faith for you that things will improve. there are always medical improvements!

And ofcourse fingers are crossed for the pageant too xx

Caro said...

Your want hope :)
My boyfriends mom beat cancer one year ago and one of my best friends mom beat it 4 times in a row. According to the doctors she should of been gone 1 year ago, but yet yesterday she was still doing 10k of bicycle every day. She is so positive. I believe that being positive can push any disease away after seeing her.

Sending you positive vibes! xx

~KS said...

Oh lady... prayers and hope? You got it. No problem. All the prayers, all the hope, all the wishes and healing and peace and everything else I have are being sent your way.

I owe you a guest post too... I promise I will get to it in the next day or so. Promise!!

love ya lots lady!

Gabby said...

Hey lady...I just saw this. I'm gonna email you, because I have been going through something very similar. There is always hope. Always. A lot can happen in 5 years. Lots of love to you, my dear.

Breanna said...

Chrystal, I am so glad you commented on my blog! I am sorry my internet has been acting up so I havent had the chance to get on here and write you back. I am sorry to hear about your mother. I will keep her in my prayers. Miracles can happen! Hope you have a great weekend and I hope the pagent goes well!!

<3 breanna
bretharpe@gmail.co

♥Aubrey said...

I'm praying hard for you hun. No one deserves to have a loved one taken from them. May your mother stay strong & prove the docs wrong. IT'S POSSIBLE!!!